[this has been a long time coming]

[parked]

I REGRET DIGGING.


[LOCKED TO STARFLEET OFFICIALS]
There is a lot of this. Another community that was closed has even more of it.
[/LOCKED]


((OOC: All replies will be forward-dated to about an hour. Sulu needs time to sort out his thoughts.))

Comments

[parked]

I'm trying, but this is like the lost ark.

...Wow, that's some horrible language translating.

[hyposprayed.livejournal.com]

Why am I pregnant in at least a dozen of these things? Hell, I'm pregnant more often that Uhura is and she actually had a damn uterus!

Forget the joking, you're getting that vaccine for opening this can of worms- one of the 'tags' is alien penis for Christ's sake!

[whogavemethevs.livejournal.com]

Because I'm Russian for one, meaning I'd be better at it. And for two, because I'm the one interested in how you pick people up.

Are you planning on picking me up?

[amazingtongue.livejournal.com]

I'm less promiscuous.

[parked]

Chekov's pregnant the most, you're tied up the most, Spock is raped the most, and Jim is... the most. It's just how these people work.

I don't need the vaccine!

[hyposprayed.livejournal.com]

Good lord, I'm trying not to read anything with your name in it. Hearing the actual stories from you is bad enough.

[parked]

You think Russians are better at everything. And why are you so interested?

What?! Why would I - what? No!

[yeswedo.livejournal.com]

So, that means you avoided 90% of the stuff with you in it, too?

[parked]

And that's a point for Lt. Uhura.

[whogavemethevs.livejournal.com]

...The lost ark. You're not Indiana Jones, you can stop looking at any time.

Yes. But take the advice. It'll help if that ever happens.

[hyposprayed.livejournal.com]

Yeah that's me, the ship's bicycle.

[parked]

Indiana Jones could look away, Pavel.

I promise to only speak in mathematical notation.

[amazingtongue.livejournal.com]

Am I leading?

[hyposprayed.livejournal.com]

Mr. Sulu I do not need the statistics!

[parked]

By a million.

[whogavemethevs.livejournal.com]

It's because it's the truth. Who's the eighteen year old navigator? Hm? It's me. And it's because I'm curious and you mentioned it first.

I was just making sure! Because you seemed offended at the idea of me picking you up instead of the other way around. And not just because of the whole picking up thing.

[amazingtongue.livejournal.com]

Isn't that what all those stories are saying?

[parked]

Those are just estimates, actually. I'm not sure I have the time or the will to actually go through and measure everything quantitatively.

[parked]

You're better at everything, that doesn't mean your country at a whole is. And you started it by trying to make me admit I was a bad ravisher with some made up girl's name!

I was offended that you assumed that you'd be the one doing the picking up because I'm not the kind of guy who gets picked up, and I don't want you thinking I am!

[whogavemethevs.livejournal.com]

Hikaru, forget I said that.

...Make sure certain people don't hear that, especially if they agree with the idea of the Kink Meme and us.

[whogavemethevs.livejournal.com]

Did you seriously just admit that? And you started it by saying you're going to ravish me.

And why don't you want me thinking that?!

[parked]

...Oh, right, that's... yeah. No problem.

[whogavemethevs.livejournal.com]

Just stick to Standard. Or have Miss Uhura teach you Russian.

[parked]

I'm a big enough man to admit when someone else is more proficient at their job than I would be in their position. And I said that sarcastically, because you were acting like I seriously got McCoy pregnant.

Because it's not true! If anyone is going to do the picking up here, it's me!

[parked]

I'll stick to Standard.

Or, you could learn Japanese.