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There were three things Sulu always expected when he woke up: some kind of alarm, his regulation sized bed and his regulation sheets. In his line of work, those were the only safe assumptions; for all anyone knew, they could be waking up to their timer alarms or the red alert alarms, or they could wake up on the floor after an attack - but they would always wake up near it.
Being that he was not really a morning person, it took Sulu a groggy minute of groaning and half-hearted stretching to realize that his three safety blankets? They weren't there. Instead, his bed felt - bigger, really, and... manlier. Really manly. Which felt weirder than the softer sheets, the metal bracelet around his wrist and the fact that he had hair in his eyes.
...Hair in his eyes.
Oh, Jesus. He knew what that meant -
Sulu snapped to attention and sat up, only to realize that he was now straddling someone, he was a girl, and he was in his boxers. And that was it. Part of him realized he was on top of Ianto, but the rest of him then followed suit and noticed that his free hand was on Jack's chest, and this was way out of his comfort zone.
Being that he was terrible at this whole "suddenly a girl thing," Sulu could only do one thing in that moment: he shrieked and tried to fling himself off the bed, despite the fact that he was handcuffed to Ianto. "SHIT!"
Being that he was not really a morning person, it took Sulu a groggy minute of groaning and half-hearted stretching to realize that his three safety blankets? They weren't there. Instead, his bed felt - bigger, really, and... manlier. Really manly. Which felt weirder than the softer sheets, the metal bracelet around his wrist and the fact that he had hair in his eyes.
...Hair in his eyes.
Oh, Jesus. He knew what that meant -
Sulu snapped to attention and sat up, only to realize that he was now straddling someone, he was a girl, and he was in his boxers. And that was it. Part of him realized he was on top of Ianto, but the rest of him then followed suit and noticed that his free hand was on Jack's chest, and this was way out of his comfort zone.
Being that he was terrible at this whole "suddenly a girl thing," Sulu could only do one thing in that moment: he shrieked and tried to fling himself off the bed, despite the fact that he was handcuffed to Ianto. "SHIT!"
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Date: 2010-07-15 09:38 pm (UTC)And of course the shriek woke Jack up as well, and since the man was a lot better at waking up in the morning than Ianto was, he took in the situation a lot quicker than the other man did. "Well," he said, getting an eyeful of the 'unknown woman's' assets, as it were. "Hello there, beautiful."
Ianto, at least, had the presence of mind to recognize that the shriek meant something not very good. He shot a look at Jack, and lightning quick, pulled the sheet over to cover her, both from Jack and from himself, because well, he was a man, and she was a gorgeous woman, and it was very hard for him not to appreciate that fact. "Here. God. I'm...I'm sorry. I don't even..." he babbled, having absolutely no idea what was going on there. "A-are...are you alright?"
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Date: 2010-07-15 09:50 pm (UTC)He held up a finger and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and counting backwards from ten, mostly to keep himself from reaching over and smacking Jack, who was acting pretty much just like Jim had when he'd - ...wait.
"Jack," Sulu said slowly, "Why are you in my uniform?" Even though it was a little too broad-shouldered to be Sulu's, the command gold was hard to see as anything but his uniform at the moment.
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Date: 2010-07-15 10:04 pm (UTC)Ianto recognized the colors and style of the uniform, but not the ranking. Whoever's uniform that was, they definitely weren't a lieutenant like Sulu was. If the person attached to him thought that that was their uniform, though, did that mean...? "Are...are you in Starfleet, then?" Ianto asked, trying to force his brain to function correctly. He hoped that the woman would give him a moment to do so. He had woken up to the shrieking of an unidentified gorgeous what, member of Starfleet all but draped over him? He was more than a little lost in that moment. "What...why are you...?" Ianto was starting to feel a little sick, actually. Maybe it was just because he wasn't used to his mornings starting out with quite such a bang, normally.
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Date: 2010-07-15 10:15 pm (UTC)The handcuffs, though. That was new. He lifted his arm up for a moment, ignoring the two of them to stare at the cuffs, which... didn't seem to have a keyhole. Oh, that was nice. "...Yeah, Ianto, I'm in Starfleet." He looked up at the other with a raised brow. "I'm Sulu. And this," he gestured to his general self, handcuffs included, "Is the community and that... Really isn't my uniform. Where did you get that?"
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Date: 2010-07-15 10:36 pm (UTC)Jack burst out laughing. "Oh my god, really? I would never've guessed. You're not usually quite as buxom as you are at the moment, Lieutenant." He shook his head, chuckling. "This is priceless. Your face. Ianto's face. And this uniform..." He chuckled some more. "I have absolutely no idea where it came from, why I'm wearing it, or whose it is, but I'm really not too concerned about that at the moment. I take it that neither of you remember getting here or ending up in this situation in the first place?" Okay, so. Jack was starting to feel a bit sick to his stomach as well, but. That could just be from all of the laughing he was holding in, because he was trying to be at least a little nice to the other two.
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Date: 2010-07-15 10:50 pm (UTC)...Shit. Did his communicator come with him? "Oh, no." Abandoning the fact that he was in nothing but a sheet (it wasn't that big a deal, really, not to him - he didn't have the modesty that women did) and that Ianto was in his underwear, Sulu climbed over him and started rooting around the bed, admittedly a little frantically. "If my comm didn't come with me, I swear to God, I will murder someone. Jack, move." Because if it hadn't come with him, he could - no, he would be in a metric ton of trouble. "And -" He paused, grabbing Jack's arm to check the hemline, "Oh, God, if you're in Jim's clothes..."
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Date: 2010-07-15 11:10 pm (UTC)Ianto didn't know whether to be flushed a deep crimson, or go absolutely white, and therefore sincerely hoped that he wasn't turning up a patchy combination of the two. If people could even do that, he didn't really know. Because, well. He was in his boxers, and Sulu had been on top of him and he really didn't feel very well at all. He wasn't sure whether he should move, or what should happen there. He looked at Jack, who was looking at him, looking almost concerned, through his amusement.
"Hey," Jack said, "you alright, there, Ianto?" Ianto couldn't nod and lie that yes, he was fine, but he couldn't say that he was necessarily hating the situation either, because well...attractive woman Sulu on top of him. He just kind of gaped at the two of them. When he did find his voice, all he could say was, "I think...I might be lying on it. The comm, that is."
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Date: 2010-07-15 11:21 pm (UTC)Sulu continued looking for a moment after Ianto spoke, because he was in a sort of panic mode without his comm, but when Ianto's words - and tone - hit him, he finally leaned back and did his best to crawl off of Ianto without causing further embarrassment. "I - good." He breathed a sigh of relief, pushing Ianto's shoulder a bit in a silent request for him to move. "...And are you okay? I didn't kick you or anything, did I?"
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Date: 2010-07-15 11:47 pm (UTC)Luckily for Sulu, Jack was starting to get on top of things, and realizing that he wasn't feeling so great either, and that Ianto was looking kind of peaky, and the only other time he'd felt like this had been when he'd been tied to Mitsuru, so. Jack sat up, and reached for Ianto. "C'mon, kid, let's get you up," he said, grabbing Ianto's shoulders to help him sit up and roll off of Sulu's comm. As soon as Jack touched him, Ianto felt immediately less sick.
"Any better?" Jack asked. Ianto nodded. Jack took his hand away. "And now?" he asked. Ianto groaned, moving to lean his head onto Jack's shoulder and slowly realize himself what was going on with the whole sick feeling and the fact that they were just as stuck together as he and Sulu were, just not as visibly so. "And better again?" Ianto nodded, and managed to find his voice enough to say, "Yeah. But...I still don't have a shirt on."
"Well," Jack said, with a smile because they'd figured it out and Ianto really was adorable before he'd woken up properly, before turning to Sulu. "I think we're all three of us going to be stuck together for the time being." He shrugged, not really minding. "So, is that your comm, are we going to have to do some more digging to find it?" he asked, with a smile that showed he wasn't too bothered about digging around in the bed with either of them.
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Date: 2010-07-16 01:36 am (UTC)"What's wrong between you two?" he asked, lifting a hand as though he were going to run it through his hair - but, well, it was attached to Ianto. Okay then. He sighed again and switched hands, tugging a bit on his hair. "Man, the least it could have done is land me in that stupid women's uniform again. This happened last time, too," he groused, "I'm sleeping in a full outfit from now on."
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Date: 2010-07-16 01:49 am (UTC)Ianto had enough presence of mind to smack Jack across the chest with his free hand and then just sort of keeping it there, to not break the touch as he picked his head up off of Jack's shoulder to turn to look at Sulu, sighing. "It...it's another virus," he said, his voice sounding more embarrassed than it really should be, considering. "We're basically going to feel sick unless we aren't touching. It happened before, that's how we know how to deal with it. Well," he said, pausing, "not between the two of us, we were stuck to different people, but the idea behind it is the same. So."
He sighed again. "We're basically going to need to stay touching, unless we want to start to feel horrible. And...we really can't leave the room from each other. Which means," he said, looking apologetically at Sulu and raising his hand with the handcuffs up, "that you're stuck to both of us, I'm afraid. Though I second your sentiments. I really don't think I'm sleeping in just boxers ever again, thanks to this community," he said, blushing.
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Date: 2010-07-16 02:02 am (UTC)Well, at least they were all friends, right? It was better than him getting caught with Sylar, or something. He frowned momentarily, then said, "That... still doesn't explain the uniform, though."
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Date: 2010-07-16 02:15 am (UTC)"Pretty weird way to virus someone, though," Jack said, with a shrug. "I mean, other than wearing this uniform, there doesn't seem to be anything else. I mean, why would it stick me in one anyway. Unless..." Jack cocked his head. "Didn't you say that you thought that it had to be someone else's uniform? Would that mean that someone else is walking around in whatever I was wearing when I went to sleep?" he asked, with a smirk. "Because, y'know, I don't tend to wear much of anything, so. There must be one seriously naked Starfleet captain out there wondering where his uniform went. Better hope he has another one. I'm sure that'd be a pretty awkward call to any of his subordinates, y'know?"
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Date: 2010-07-16 02:24 am (UTC)He sort of wished he had a uniform right now, though, as he sat back on his knees, using his free hand to hold his sheet-dress up. "...I don't want to rain on anyone's parade, here, but..." He gestured to said sheet, "I might... need to wear something, sometime soon."
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Date: 2010-07-16 03:17 am (UTC)"The Defiant, eh?" Jack asked, with a smirk. That had definitely been some flirting, there. "Impressive that you can recognize things like that. Interesting that the uniforms are also marked for which ship you're on, though. I mean, well. We didn't really have uniforms out of the Agency School, but. We certainly didn't have anything like that, in any of the wars or such that I've been in. Lucky for me, too. I've been assigned to some pretty unfortunately named ships, over the years."
At the mention of clothes, though, Ianto stiffened a little bit, as an idea came to him. "If...if you'd like, you could have something of mine, but. I...I have some of Lisa's stuff around in storage. It might be a little big on you, but. I'm sure there must be something in there that would fit, but. It's really up to you. I...I don't know how long it is that we're going to be stuck like this, so. Maybe...maybe it's better if we went to find something in there, yeah? I mean, I'm taller than you normally, so. I bet that anything I give you of mine would probably look ridiculous, anyway."
Jack had mixed emotions about Lisa. He hadn't ever known her before she was the Cyberwoman trying to kill his team, including Ianto himself, so. His opinion of her was a little skewed. But it was obvious that Ianto had loved her, so. He didn't know how much Sulu knew about Lisa, but he hoped that regardless, Sulu would understand that Ianto offering off Lisa's clothes obviously meant that they were pretty close friends, considering what he'd kept of hers was obviously special to him and hard to get rid of like he did the rest. Jack put a hand on Ianto's back, subtly rubbing gently.
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Date: 2010-07-16 03:58 am (UTC)He paused at the offer - he didn't know anything about Lisa, not really, but he'd heard Ianto mention her name a few times, always with a melancholy nostalgic air. He... Well, he couldn't really wear anything that Ianto wore, not really, because he couldn't pull things on over one arm, but - "I - don't want to make you go digging through your storage," Sulu said, in a tone that indicated that it wasn't just for convenience's sake. He didn't want to bring up bad memories, not for Ianto or for Jack, who obviously knew much more than Sulu did about this whole thing. "In all honesty, I probably could deal with a towel. It's not like it... really matters, you know?" Clothes would be much easier for him to deal with, but... well. A towel wasn't that personal.
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Date: 2010-07-16 04:10 am (UTC)Although it was tempting to side with Sulu and say that it really didn't matter, that he wouldn't mind the other--well, actually, Sulu was a woman, at the moment, then, wasn't he?--he wouldn't mind Sulu walking around in just a sheet and boxers for the whole day, not when he was looking like this, but. He knew better, especially when Ianto was offering up Lisa's clothes for him. "I wouldn't have a problem with it, either way," he said, instead. "I mean, we might have to get out of the flat, anyway. Who knows whether the Hub's set up to..." Jack trailed off, looking down at his wrist. "Fuck," he said, "the bastard has my wriststrap!"
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Date: 2010-07-16 04:22 am (UTC)His poker face as a woman was decidedly a little better than it was normally, so when he offered Jack a half-smile, it looked earnest. "Don't worry about it. I'm sure the captain won't do anything with it." That wasn't really helpful, but there wasn't exactly much Sulu could offer to do, here.
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Date: 2010-07-16 04:34 am (UTC)Ianto raised an eyebrow at Jack, trying to be a calming presence, there. "Alright, alright. We'll go to the Hub. C'mon, then," he said, motioning for Jack to get up and for Sulu to do the same, so he didn't have to climb over either of them to get out of the bed. "The crawl space is above the closet, all you have to do is pop up there. Like I said, that box is the only thing up there, so it's not like it'll be too hard to find." He let go of Jack, knowing that they'd be fine for a few moments not touching, as Jack pulled the door in the ceiling open and pulled out the footstool Ianto had waiting there specifically for that purpose.
Not even a minute later, Jack'd pulled down the box and put it on the foot of Ianto's bed. Ianto moved to put a hand on Jack's shoulder, both for the touch, and also for the thanks. "Alright, well," he said, before moving to go through the box, before pausing. "Oh. I...well. This won't be a problem for you, but. Damn it all." He turned to Sulu, raising the hand that was cuffed to Sulu's. "We're...not going to be able to manage sleeves, with these things on."
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Date: 2010-07-16 04:48 am (UTC)When Ianto motioned to their handcuffed hands, Sulu frowned. "...Yeah, that's going to be a problem." If Sulu was being honest with himself, it really was definitely not a problem, because Ianto definitely didn't look bad shirtless and, well, in his boxers - but. But. For going out in public, it probably would be awkward.
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Date: 2010-07-16 04:59 am (UTC)"Aha!" he said, pulling it out of the box, and holding it up to Sulu. "Here you are. You should be able to step into it and get it on that way. As for the bottoms," Ianto said, coloring. "Obviously you'll need some pants, but. Other than that...I'm guessing you'd prefer trousers, but. I'm not sure that Lisa's would fit you, so. You might be better off with one of her skirts, if... If that's okay with you..."
Jack smirked at the two of them. "Are you sure you're not just saying things like that because you want to get the pretty lady to show off her nice legs, Ianto?" Jack asked, joking around for the moment, because his options were either joke or fume, and Sulu didn't seem to be too keen on him fuming at the unidentified Starfleet captain that was now in possession of his prized wriststrap. Ianto turned and gave Jack a look that clearly stated that the comment was not appreciated. Even if the thought was now planted in his mind, and wasn't coming out any time soon.
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Date: 2010-07-16 05:08 am (UTC)And though Ianto looked very unamused at Jack's comment, Sulu couldn't help but grin at the man, raising an eyebrow. "I'm no lady, captain. But," he ducked his head to check out his own legs, "They are pretty spectacular, I'd say. I make a pretty kickass woman, all things considered."
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Date: 2010-07-16 05:24 am (UTC)Jack grinned. Ianto was being charmingly polite about the whole situation, and it was beyond amusingly adorable for him. "Kickass woman in some pretty kickass clothes, if you don't mind me saying. Now." He smiled, raising an eyebrow, and grinning widely at Sulu. "How are you going to make us turn around for you to get dressed if you're tied to Ianto? Because it's pretty hard to get dressed one-handed, that's all I'm saying." Ianto's back stiffened, and he had to take a pause to breathe and not yell at Jack, doing some counting of his own. He was pretty sure that Jack was doing all of this on purpose now, damn him.
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Date: 2010-07-16 05:36 am (UTC)"In all honesty? I don't really have too much of a problem, here. You're both adult enough to turn around and give me some privacy, right? You especially," he said, giving Jack a look. Sulu had come to terms with this womanly state of his, especially now that he knew he had his comm and that, well, he wasn't going to have to worry about his job or his crew finding out about this. Not only that, but it was easier to be more calm about this the second time around. "You're the one bringing all this stuff up, one after another."
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Date: 2010-07-16 03:19 pm (UTC)Ianto, on the other hand, was a bit nervous for this, because for one, getting clothes on one-handed was a challenge. He knew from when he'd dislocated his shoulder and he'd been ordered by doctors to keep it in a sling for a few days, that it ached too much to move around enough to use it to get dressed. He was actually worried that Sulu just might have to use his other hand, and then Ianto's hand would be that much closer to touching and things could just go so horribly wrong, there, and. Jack reached out a hand and put it on Ianto's shoulder, and he jumped, snapping back into his thoughts. "Yes," Ianto said, knowing that it would probably be a long time before this blush left his face, "right. We'll...we'll give you as much privacy as we can, and you can just. Change. I'll...I'll obviously need to stick close by, but."
"Relax, Ianto," Jack said, physically turning Ianto around, "we both know that you won't be anything less than a gentleman about it. Now. Give the lady her space," he said, winking at Ianto before turning back to look at the opposite wall with Ianto. "Alright, then, Lieutenant, work your magic!"
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